having my Cake, eating it – and not counting every last calorie

as i sheepishly return November 14, 2006

Filed under: Uncategorized — c*devotchka @ 6:02 pm
Tags: ,

i know a few people who are going to be absolutely delighted that i’ve decided to tap into my uncontrollable urge to blog again. chocolate bars can only do so much to contain the shakes.

i’d said to Edna that i wanted to stop blogging and go back to emailing. however, with instant messengers – it’s hard to email the very people you govoreet the entire day with.

it’s mid November, almost an entire year has gone by again. i still feel like i’m 19 – but i’ll be 25 in half a year. you see, the things one thinks of the most when one is not lawfully employed by any corporation can lie wide and varied between practical and hysterical.

i don’t want anyone reading my blog to spiral downwards into a vortex of obsessive compulsive worries so i will introduce you to the thoughts that lie closer to the practical musings of my complacent mind.

“what next, dali?”

i wake up, then, what next? i flush cystitis-causing bacteria away, i blind myself with desert sunlight pouring into our living room, then what’s next is that i’ll switch on my beloved mac, the tv, then plop myself onto our gawdy brown sofa hoping that the rest of my body will wake up within the next hour.

what’s next is i conjure, with a magic wand (the cable tv remote control) and a *poof* – an imaginary scrolling menu of foods in the fridge in my head. then which channel to watch, or perhaps iTunes and an early morning session to destroy my new perfect post-Lasik eyesight poring through tens and tens of useless websites.

sometimes i iron, sometimes i watch Martha Stewart, sometimes i shake my head watching Dr Phil, sometimes i get inspired watching Oprah, sometimes i laugh my ass off watching reruns of Third Rock from the Sun and sometimes i grab the kitchen scissors and snip off my butt-caressing curls in the bathroom.

sheared curls
and sometimes, i go, “what next, dali?”

i look for Archaeology or Psychology degrees i could possibly take up, i glide through possible career options online, i surf websites for products i’d like to sell in my shop
(1), i read up extensively on charitable organisations i’d like to be a part of, i fantasise about having children sometime in the next five years – including adopting one.

the best and worst thing about being in your 20s is that you have the whole world in front of you and, you have the whole world in front of you.

i’ve given myself till 31st December to decide what i’ll do next.

for now, i’m putting the house in order after weeks of slothing off on the sofa, walking aimlessly between the kitchen and the bathroom, getting lost in between – and i don’t just mean forgetting why i went to the kitchen. after all, if your house is not in order – nothing else can be.

(1) the shop i’d open up if we were more sure about how long we’re staying here in the gulf


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